i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
the raccoons are back...
Randomize