Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
