I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
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He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
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I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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