I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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