fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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