yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
