There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
