Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
