whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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