Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize