1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
