I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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