my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
