Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Dignity is for republicans.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize