all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
