We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
We had to coat check the pizza.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
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