My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
We left an ass print on the piano.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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