If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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