You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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