So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
