Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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