dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Mom said you looked used
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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