butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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