operation harelip BJ is a go
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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