And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
My vagina is officially offended.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
