I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
