Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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