sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize