Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize
