Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
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