sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
