Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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