Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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