is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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