You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
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When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
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my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
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