Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
