Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize