ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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