butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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