i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
