So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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