i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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