just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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