If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
