why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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