My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
