dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
