Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
