I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize