Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Randomize
